Surprisingly Sweet

One day recently, he and I were visiting, and he brought up a lunchroom incident that was weighing heavily on his mind. He said that a classmate was wearing a hood over his head in the cafeteria, and a child from a different class asked why. When the boy removed the hood, his too-short new haircut was revealed. The hood had been used to alleviate his embarrassment, and the students in his own class were already aware of this. When he removed the hood, several children from the other class hee-hawed and pointed, which humiliated the child. My little visitor who was relaying this story lowered his head and shook it sadly. "I didn't laugh," he said. "I just started making funny faces like my famous crossed eyes. I wanted to cheer him up and make him laugh."Have you ever discovered a surprisingly sweet side to someone you had previously seen in a whole different light? This semester, I've been working with a freckle-faced first grader whom I'd previously viewed as very inattentive, wiggly, and high-maintenance. This was because I'd only been around him in classroom settings and hadn't had the chance to get to know him as an individual. Boy am I glad he was referred to me!

I've been teaching the first graders about dealing with bothering and bullying, and one of our most recent lessons was on being a helpful bystander. Never laugh, report bullying, and be extra nice to the victim have been the major pieces of advice I've dispensed on this topic. It was very heartwarming to hear about this being applied "in the trenches", but I really believe that my little friend would have instinctively taken up for his embarrassed crony anyway. He just has that kind of tender heart.

When I told his teacher about this sweet story, she told me of another incident that happened at lunch. As she told it, one of her more sensitive children had been accused of kicking trash around the floor in the cafeteria, and he was sobbing about getting in trouble. My "hero" friend went to the teacher and admitted that he himself had been the one making the mess, not the crying child who had been accused. The teacher said that the story about the short haircut didn't surprise her at all because that's just how my new friend is.

This is a good lesson for me and for probably all of us. If we are able and willing to get to know people better, chances are good that even those we consider the most annoying will have admirable traits that give us a new perspective on them. At the risk of sounding like a bonafide hippie, peace and love, brothers and sisters!